[stinger: “How many Subarus in the parking lot?” … “All of them.”]
Zanger: All right. Subaru jokes, right? I know. It’s just jokes.
Kyle: Yeah, but it’s true. I owned one. I owned one in Colorado.
Zanger: Of course you did. Schiff, can you hear me? Oh — there’s Schiff. Hold on. Oh my God. It is a Festivus miracle. All right, let me get the levels right here. I love it. This worked. What’s going on, buddy?
Dave Schiff: Can you hear me?
Zanger: Yes, caller, go ahead. Yes, caller, you’re on the air. Go right ahead.
Schiff: “Go right ahead, caller” — yes, I’m from that time. That’s an appropriate response. I just want to say this. First of all, the drama for the listeners of just a guy trying to join a call — the arc of this, the emotional arc — amazing.
Zanger: I told you to turn off your speakers, goofball.
Schiff: I don’t know how to use—
Zanger: No, no, no. If you were listening to KYGO back in the day, and you were like, oh my gosh, I can get tickets for Atlanta Rhythm Section at Fiddler’s Green — they’re going to tell you to turn down your radio.
Schiff: All right, wait. So here’s the thing. And this is Colorado-related, and it’s ad-related. There’s a time I would have been ashamed of my lack of digital acumen and tech acumen. That time is over. With the rise of AI and everyone freaking out, I feel like right now, sucking at tech is like a f—ing feather in your cap. I don’t even know if I can say bad words.
Zanger: It’s streaming. Don’t worry about it.
Schiff: Anyway. Years and years ago, we were trying to say that Ask.com was great technology — we were fighting Google. That didn’t really work. But we ran a billboard that said “The Unabomber loves Ask.” And yes, that ran. I can find it. I’ll send it to you.
Zanger: Please do.
Schiff: It was a way of saying, okay, obviously this guy hates tech, so he hates the algorithm. We were trying to say that it’s sophisticated. Also, he was incarcerated right here in beautiful Florence, Colorado. And he recently passed away — God or Satan rest his soul, I’m not sure how that works. But anyway. So I’m saying, right now, I’m on trend. The divergence with tech, and then branding and marketing in the dystopian future — it is dystopia.
Zanger: That’s why we’re throwing it back a little bit here. I love it. We do a lot of video, and we had all these false starts and stops, and I just got to the point where I said, you know, this is what I love. This is what Kyle loves. This is part of what we do, and we just need to figure out a better way to do this.
So now, Schiff, I want to talk a little bit about — will there be more stunts? I’m talking about the demolition derby thing that happened. Now, don’t give away anything that’s under embargo, because the rest of your guys are going to get upset. But do you have anything cooking that we need to be aware of?
Schiff: We do. And I can’t.
Zanger: Can’t say what it is. That’s fine.
Schiff: I can’t say what it is, but yes, we do. And you guys mentioned E-470 — which is like the least sexy advertising account, right? Did you guys see any of the stunts we did for those guys?
Zanger: Yes. Loved it. I wrote about that.
Schiff: That stuff is still blowing up. It’s great, because on TikTok, no one reads anything. Everyone’s in on the joke, but it’s still going, and people are like, “You know what? I knew they were stealing my money. I knew it was owned by China.” It’s free media that never ends.
Zanger: You know what? Colorado likes a good conspiracy theory.
Schiff: Oh, absolutely.
Zanger: I’m here in Oregon, and you would think we’re the ones with the tinfoil hats.
Schiff: You’re the epicenter.
Zanger: I guess to some degree. Well — where Kyle is. Oh boy.
Kyle: The Poconos are ripe for it.
Zanger: There’s real stuff there that’s even scarier. Here’s the thing: I think the conspiracy theories that come out of Colorado and out of Oregon might be more on the quirky side. What’s your favorite Colorado conspiracy theory? And you can’t say the airport.
Schiff: Okay, man. I don’t know whether to classify this as a conspiracy. I would say it’s more of a spiritual question. And it’s airport-adjacent, but we worked on it. Are you familiar with Blucifer?
Zanger: Oh, yes.
Schiff: So for people listening who don’t know: it’s a gigantic blue horse sculpture. It’s horrifying. It looks like it’s on fire. Its eyes are illuminated red. It’s one of the weirdest pieces of civic artwork I’ve ever seen.
We made an owner’s manual for E-470 — that was the brand book. As a driver, you’re a stakeholder, a part owner. And in there we had the sights you can see along the whole 47-mile stretch, and one of them is Lucifer. And Lucifer killed the artist who made it.
Zanger: Yes. We do know that.
Schiff: You’re getting on a plane, you’re kind of like, do these things go down? And then you see this huge horse with lit-up eyes, and I don’t know what you’re supposed to take away. I generally just get a huge sense of doom. Halfway through building it, it fell on the guy making it and killed him. And instead of saying, hey, maybe we just don’t mess with this, they went all in. They finished it. And it’s out there, and we featured it in the work.
So I know that’s not a conspiracy. But the deep, philosophical — maybe spiritual — question for listeners is: if you’ve been to Denver, if you’ve seen Lucifer, do you discount it as just another piece of civic artwork at your peril?
Zanger: So from Schiff we get disquiet, acumen, and other ten-cent words. We appreciate that very, very much. Listen, we’ve got to get to the next song. Dave Schiff, Standard Practice — thank you for joining. Y’all are awesome.
Schiff: Thank you, guys. You’re the best. You’re the weirdest. Keep doing this. Nothing says real like a bunch of technical mistakes. I love that. Incredible.
Zanger: I love that. We’re going to keep the music going. It’s Big Gigantic, “The Little Things.” It’s Good Day Advertising, IndieHQ Radio.